Today, we went to the kitchen to get a snack and we found a packet of cheese. It looked tasty-licious. The only problem was that it was still sealed in the plastic package. We thought, “no big deal. We’ll just open it.” We tried to open it, but it was too damn tough to get open. Seriously, it was like impossible to open without help from cheese-packet opener experts. We got discouraged, so we got out a chainsaw to slash it open, but then Bill (our Dad) caught us and made us put it away. Then he opened it for us with his bare hands. Whoa.
Cheese packets are way to hard to get open. The little plastic-y things are always stuck together and stuff. Someone should do something about it. We recommend writing to Congress. Maybe someone should start a “Cheese-Packet Recovery Program” for people who tried to open cheese packets but failed. But we’re not gonna; it’s up to you. ‘Cause we’re too lazy.